9 December 2013 diary

9 December 2013 diary.

Dear everyone in Heaven and earth,

This Monday was the day I fell again.

I woke up in the morning feeling neutral. I went to work on time. The work on that day was very quiet and I was happy about it. My boss was not in the office. I ate fried rice with chicken for lunch. It was not delicious so I decided never eat that again. I sent joke messages on WhatsApp to Meifi in Sydney. I made her laugh too. Work finished at 5pm and I went home. I watered the small plants in front of my house.

At home I was not in peace again. I was very stressful and very sad. I forgot God as well. At 9pm I did my mistake again, it was my true stupidity and I became even more depressed about it. Oh well, what had been done, it was done and it could be undone. It was my fault and was my idiot thought. I walked and fell on the bed almost unable to sleep and got up until 10:05pm. I straight ate small Subway seafood for dinner. I washed dishes and after that I drank wine from the fridge to cool down my feeling.

After that I took shower and spent my lonely evening feeling guilty at all the time in front of my computer. I was going to do video editing but I decided not doing it. I will have to go to church to have another confession and ask forgiveness from God before Christmas.

I called my mom to wish her safe flight to Perth on the next day.
After that I slept with feeling guilty and sadness after I pray to God.

That could be the worst day in December 2013.